Karma?

Sometimes it seems Karma does work. It takes a long time, but it seems to happen.

At my place of employment there is an example. When we opened a year and a half ago there were four “teams”, or shifts. Each shift had a shift coordinator/Mental Health Professional. We are legally the only ones who could do certain assessments, intake paperwork, daily psych notes, and so on. The system is used at almost every inpatient mental health facility in the state. A short time after opening one of the MHPs left. She was replaced by another MHP. Then another MHP left and was replaced. That replacement left and was not replaced. Another MHP shifted to a different job description but was not replaced. So there were only two teams with an MHP. Anything that had to be done during the other two shifts was supposed to be done by the MHP who had changed job titles. This did not work well. Finally another MHP was hired. But they were not assigned to a team. They worked the same hours as the reassigned MHP to lighten their load. So there were still two teams without an MHP. On weekends when those shifts without an MHP worked one of the non-shift MHPs was supposed to be on call. All documentation required every 24 hours was done by the shift MHPs. Then one of those MHPs left. It was decided that that position again would not be filled. So only one team would have an MHP. That was me. The two non-shift MHPs would have to be on call anytime I was not working. They also had to do the daily documentation for those days I was not scheduled.

This system did not work well, as often intake paperwork was delayed and daily documentation was done from home by them. There was still no change. Then a few weeks ago I requested a couple of days off to take a vacation. I have been working at my home facility and our sister facility to help cover shifts (they still insist on having an MHP present on each shift) and I needed some “down time”. Then last week one of the non-assigned MHPs was hurt on the job and will be out for an unknown period of time. So for the next week the one non-shift MHP left standing will be on call 24/7. This did not make that person happy. The fact is this person was the one that convinced the facility administrator that we did not need MHPs for the shifts. 

Karma working? Well, probably not. It seems to me that every time I think that Karma has come back to get the person that caused the problem it jumps from them to me. I have no doubt that I will have them trying to get me to cut short my vacation. If I don't I will be blamed for the problem. Though I have insisted that we needed to have an MHP assigned to each shift. I will be seen as a troublemaker or a discontent. 

Maybe I will see Karma work out the way it is supposed to. It never has anywhere I have worked. But there is always a first time.

Driving Mrs. Hansen

A small comment: I don’t remember my Mom ever driving a car or truck. She passed away when I was 11 but she was feeling well enough to work for some of the years before that. She was very sick towards the end of her life as she fought cancer. But it seems odd that I have no memory of my Mom driving. I checked with my older sister and she had the same memory. I remember my Dad driving, my older brothers and sisters driving, even uncles and aunts driving. But not my Mom. The speculation from my family is that before she became housebound with her cancer that she just didn’t necessarily like to drive.

But that confuses me, as my Dad worked swing shift for many years. My Mom would have had errands to run. She had small children who would need to go to doctor’s appointment, clothes shopping, and other “Mom stuff”. Even driving to her jobs. There was no bus service at that time in Bountiful so she couldn’t have used public transportation.

So I am left with the question of why I don’t remember my Mom driving. It is a little thing, but it is something that I can’t explain. I remember her making Divinity, homemade donuts, painting while in her wheelchair, going to church, playing the piano and much more.

Maybe it was something so unimportant that my mind decided that it didn’t need to store it in my long-term memory files (which get more crowded every day). But I had room for memories of cub scout meetings, playing mumbly peg with pocket knives (explain that to today’s safety conscious parents) and other very disposable memories. But not that memory.

So I shouldn’t obsess about it. It just feels like a small missing piece of my “Mom Memory” jigsaw puzzle. And I wonder what my kids will remember from their childhood. I know that they will remember the big things, but what about the minor memories?

I guess that at my age I worry about missing memories, no matter how small and how long ago. I guess that I will need to keep organizing my memories files in the big file cabinet of my mind. And just take note of what is missing.